Brown Runoff

I can't believe I've waited so long to write this, but I have, and boy, it's good.

As reported by John Solomon in the
Washington Post, Republican hopeful, Massachusetts Governor and this year's most famous Mormon, Mitt Romney, apparently is a dog lover of a different breed.

The Post quotes a profile in the Boston Globe that describes how, in 1983, Mitt took the whole family on a trip from Boston to Ontario. Having packed up the car, the Romneys find they just can't squeeze their beloved Irish setter, Seamus, inside the vehicle. No problem. There's room on the roof.

So, Seamus was installed on the roof for the 12-hour trip. But Seamus was naturally terrified at being hurled along the highway toward the Great White North, and this terror, naturally, made its way down through Seamus's digestive tract. At this point, I've got to rely on the Washington Post's understatement of events:

"When Romney's eldest son, Tagg, and his four brothers complained about the brown runoff down the back windshield, their father quietly pulled the car over, borrowed a gas station hose and sprayed down both the dog and the kennel before returning to the road."

First off, Tagg? Is that really what passes for a first name these days? Second, brown runoff? And can you imagine what other motorists thought of the spectacle? A carful of boys, a dog in its kennel strapped to the roof, and a flotsam of dog diarrhea making its way up to the border. Boy, I'm glad the Romney family didn't own a St. Bernard.

See you in Iowa!